8th July 2007 - Antibiotics II

Yup, his arm has flared up again. What a surprise! The named carer approached me today to let me know that his arm was inflammed again. Rather redundant information 1) because I knew that'd happen after they gave him antibiotics the other week when 'there's obviously something up with him' and 2) because I could see the puss soaking through his shirt sleeve. Her eyes followed mine to his arm and she rushed in with "I've bandaged it up three or four times today already but he just takes it off". She's maybe telling the truth but I've seen him trying to do a button. It's almost impossible for him and this shirt has three buttons at the cuff that would require to be negociated to allow the sleeve to go high enough over the elbow to permit him access to remove a bandage.

Dad, I don't know what to do for the best for you. I don't want you to be in pain, I don't want you to be sad, I don't want you to be lonely. I don't want people ruffling your hair as if you where a child or shouting at you as if you are deaf. I don't want other residents telling you to fuck off and treating you like you are stupid because you don't understand them. I don't want you being scared. If I was on my own, I'd bring you home. But I'm not. I have other people to care for too. I'm sorry, so very sorry.